The Cathartic thread - rant here!

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lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Sat Feb 25, 2017 3:48 am

Last year I collaborated with a creative arts practitioner from an American university on a public engagement project based on my PhD research with conflict-affected youth. Today I found out that she has published a detailed piece online (immediately available to search engines, no paywall) that describes how I broke the law in a particular conflict zone and frequently mentions my real name. She has redacted the name of my manager in that country - but retained the name of the organisation, so anyone could find out who the manager is within a second of Googling. I'm supposed to be going back there in six weeks and this could actually land me in an interrogation room. It could land my former colleagues in interrogation and they don't have a burgundy passport to protect them from torture. Aghast doesn't even begin to describe how I feel right now. I'm also angry at the factual inaccuracies that riddle the piece and again are attributed to me by name: this lecturer has no country-specific knowledge and all my patient explanations and reading recommendations seem to have gone unheard. But this is a minor concern. I'm going to raise an ethics complaint.
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

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Contrarian
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Contrarian » Sat Feb 25, 2017 2:29 pm

lingua_franca wrote:Last year I collaborated with a creative arts practitioner from an American university on a public engagement project based on my PhD research with conflict-affected youth. Today I found out that she has published a detailed piece online (immediately available to search engines, no paywall) that describes how I broke the law in a particular conflict zone and frequently mentions my real name. She has redacted the name of my manager in that country - but retained the name of the organisation, so anyone could find out who the manager is within a second of Googling. I'm supposed to be going back there in six weeks and this could actually land me in an interrogation room. It could land my former colleagues in interrogation and they don't have a burgundy passport to protect them from torture. Aghast doesn't even begin to describe how I feel right now. I'm also angry at the factual inaccuracies that riddle the piece and again are attributed to me by name: this lecturer has no country-specific knowledge and all my patient explanations and reading recommendations seem to have gone unheard. But this is a minor concern. I'm going to raise an ethics complaint.
This sounds horrible! Hope something is done to resolve this. It's awful to be unfairly portrayed and if there is a risk of interrogation and torture for your former colleagues... what on Earth was this person thinking?!

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AnnSimone
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by AnnSimone » Wed Mar 01, 2017 2:09 pm

Lecturers who clearly shouldn't be lecturers because of their clear lack of emotional intelligence. How can anyone think it's appropriate to continue verbal bashing of someone who's clearly having a panic attack in tears? Someone really needs to learn to practise what they preach. By that I mean reflect of how you treat others and acknowledge they're in the wrong.

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Sun Apr 02, 2017 8:59 pm

Three incidences of sexual harassment from complete strangers in the space of TWO HOURS. :evil: The first: I was sitting on the bus, lost in thought, when a man stopped in the aisle and gestured for me to move my bag so he could sit down next to me. I did so automatically, and then noticed that there were plenty of vacant seats next to other men and he'd walked past several to get to me. I put my headphones in and turned pointedly to stare out of the window, to show there would be no conversation, and he leaned over and said, "I'm sorry you don't have much space." Dude, if I stab you with this propelling pencil I'll have all the space I need and you'll be sorrier still. Unfortunately I wasn't in the mood for confrontation, so I just got off the bus and walked the rest of the way home. En route I experienced some more delightful attentions: some teenagers wolf-whistled at me, and then a man called after me with the same "tsh-tsh-tsh" noise you use to attract a cat, interspersed with shouted demands to know where I was going. I arrived home in a vile mood. These are the days when political lesbianism looks very appealing.
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

AJ555
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by AJ555 » Sun Oct 29, 2017 12:52 pm

What has annoyed me recently is the "feedback" I received following an interview.

It consisted of "everyone is in the same boat as you. They've either got their masters, are currently doing it, or going to do it". Well firstly, that's three different boats, and I am more than my masters. No real feedback.

Judging from what I was told, the people appointed to the positions were already working there as he suggested applying for jobs that they're going to be advertising. I guess that would perhaps explain why the CP appeared quite disinterested during the interview.

randomgrapes
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by randomgrapes » Tue Oct 31, 2017 1:09 pm

I think my rant is quite small compared to everyone else's but this is something that really annoyed me yesterday!

Me and my boyfriend work in the same building, so at exactly 4:30pm yesterday he messaged me to say it was time to go (he sometimes has to stay late and I never do, so I wait for him to say he's ready before I pack up and leave). I immediately log off, get my bag, and head downstairs. 5 minutes later he's still not in reception?

Why tell me it's time to go and then not actually be ready to go?! I wouldn't mind so much if it was a one time thing but this is pretty much every time, I end up waiting in reception looking like a lemon!

Ah well, only a few more hours until the end of the day, then I don't have to go to the gym tonight so I can sit in my pjs all evening and watch the Bake Off final!

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Fri Jun 08, 2018 12:20 am

It was the assessment board meeting today at the uni where I am a sessional lecturer. My department head made it clear to me that I needed to attend. I was worried that the external examiner had concerns about my marking. I got up at five a.m. in order to get there on time, as repair works on the railway meant I would need to take the scenic route. On the train I discovered that I'd lost my railcard and would need to buy a full price ticket. Then I lost that ticket, so I ended up paying for two tickets and making a six-hour round trip...in order to spend 45 minutes sitting in a meeting that I didn't actually need to attend at all. My marks had all been validated and there were no questions for me. At the end of it the HoD came over to me and went, "That was a bit of a wasted journey for you." Erm, you don't say!!! Frankly I couldn't afford to spend the best part of my day schlepping over there for nothing. I have a ton of stuff to do. And as the piece de resistance, I'm not getting paid for most of that - only for the 45 minutes I actually sat in the room for. The salary has of course been eaten by train fares. :evil:
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

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Geishawife
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Geishawife » Sat Jul 21, 2018 3:28 pm

Believe me, I'm all for children having both an opinion and a voice, but I do NOT think allowing both without the slightest bit of guidance or boundary setting is acceptable if it leads to the DISGRACEFUL behaviour I witnessed from your son today. If he does not like dogs, WHY BRING HIM TO OUR HOUSE?? You know we have dogs. And not liking dogs does NOT give him permission to chase them and kick them. Our dogs are rescues and one had a very serious accident last year so they have been through enough and do not need your 10 year old (yes, 10 YEAR OLD!!) doing this to them. Moreover, NOBODY, especially a 10 year old, speaks to my 93 year old father-in-law in such rude and disrespectful terms when he has simply asked your son to desist in his behaviour towards the dogs!! You say this is "progressive parenting" that allows a child "free expression". I call such an example of "free expression" nothing more than complete and utter rudeness. Our child is welcomed in many homes because she is polite, kind, respectful and well - mannered. Your son is nothing more than a brat!! Rant over!!

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Victoriomantic
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Victoriomantic » Sun Jul 22, 2018 9:11 am

I am so sick of near-faceless upper-level management making decisions that affect ground floor clinical working practices without actually consulting clinical staff.... not only do their "solutions" not work and cause tons of issues... but we also have no idea of the problem they are trying to fix! Why not come to us with a problem and ask for our opinions? It makes literally no sense...... grrrrrrrr >:(

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Tue Jul 24, 2018 4:59 am

Ugh, Geishawife, your poor dogs. :( I hope they're OK. Your father-in-law, too. That child's behaviour is hardly the best advert for his parents' theories...

Speaking of rubbish theories, today I met some parents who have bought into some very expensive and non-evidence-based programme to "treat" dyslexia and dyspraxia. :( They told me that they are taking their son to a "world-leading psychologist". The person in question doesn't have any kind of psychology degree, and certainly not a practitioner doctorate. Both the title and the adjective are self-bestowed. Unfortunately I didn't have much luck persuading them that this is not a good route to go down - evidence-based practice sounds so dry and killjoy when you compare it to glossy brochures and photos and anecdotal testimonials. :evil:
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

rhapsodyinred
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by rhapsodyinred » Tue Aug 21, 2018 3:18 pm

I'm fed up with my manager making:

a) homophobic comments ("that sound a bit gay, doesn't it? and "well it's just a bit gay really") and then apologising to me and saying "oh sorry, that was probably against our equality and diversity policy!" Please, don't censor yourself for my queer a**. Don't say those things because that's THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
b) racist comments: after a black client who is very sensitive about race after having faced discrimination at work in the past asked to join the table in the community centre that my manager was sitting at, said manager answered "no, this table's only for white people". WHAT THE ACTUAL EF.
c) Nagging comments abut weight loss and diets: "eating a lot of junk food, aren't you?", "careful, you might become allergic to vegetables", "I thought you said you'd lost weight when you were sick?" and my favourite, "well, if your Crohn's is getting bad again at least you'll lose some of that extra weight you're carrying".

SO. MUCH. RAGE.

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firegal
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by firegal » Tue Aug 21, 2018 3:49 pm

rhapsodyinred wrote:
Tue Aug 21, 2018 3:18 pm
I'm fed up with my manager making:

a) homophobic comments ("that sound a bit gay, doesn't it? and "well it's just a bit gay really") and then apologising to me and saying "oh sorry, that was probably against our equality and diversity policy!" Please, don't censor yourself for my queer a**. Don't say those things because that's THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
b) racist comments: after a black client who is very sensitive about race after having faced discrimination at work in the past asked to join the table in the community centre that my manager was sitting at, said manager answered "no, this table's only for white people". WHAT THE ACTUAL EF.
c) Nagging comments abut weight loss and diets: "eating a lot of junk food, aren't you?", "careful, you might become allergic to vegetables", "I thought you said you'd lost weight when you were sick?" and my favourite, "well, if your Crohn's is getting bad again at least you'll lose some of that extra weight you're carrying".

SO. MUCH. RAGE.
Eurgh, you think this stuff is done with and then you meet people in powerful positions who just carry right along. In my CAMHS placement one of the psychiatrists referred to a client as "coconut girl" in MDT "you know, brown on the outside, white on the inside" :x not to mention the numerous transphobic and downright ignorant comments any time a questioning or non-binary client was raised, don't you just love it when a clinician thinks they can figure out after one meeting who is "really" trans* and who is "attention seeking" :roll:
I am so astonished every time, still haven't learned how to appropriately challenge this stuff though, especially when no one else in a meeting bats an eye.

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Tue Aug 21, 2018 5:42 pm

I know how you feel about being unsure how to challenge that kind of thing. I was at a conference once (I'm hesitant even to give detail, as I know there is a high probability that some attendees will know this forum) and one psychologist on the panel compared veterans to BME people, saying that "we would never treat black people with the disrespect that veterans are treated". I challenged that, but in a very mild way - something like "I think you should reconsider comparisons to racism given the very serious inequalities that still exist. This comparison feels especially out of place to me as the overwhelming majority of people killed in recent wars have all been people of colour." My tone was level. She shouted at me. Literally. She was shouting "Are you saying I'm not politically correct?" and ranting about how grateful she is to the army. No one in the room spoke and I felt (probably wrongly) that people were blaming me for stirring this up. Another delegate did approach me at the end and thank me for saying what I had, but it would have been nice if the moderator had stepped in to prevent that panellist from yelling at me like that - it was pretty intimidating and it has made me feel quite unnerved at the idea of going to other conferences where she might be.
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

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firegal
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by firegal » Tue Aug 21, 2018 5:59 pm

Thanks for sharing that lingua, I'm not surprised you feel anxious about future run ins, sounds horrid! I often feel so guilty for not challenging things and sometimes I don't think I fully acknowledge to myself just how tricky it is to do. I aspire to be the kind of clinician who is outspoken on social issues and who can challenge those kinds of behaviours when they occur, but the reality is I'm not there yet, and the uncomfortable truth is that as a trainee sometimes I opt to protect my professional relationships over my social values for the sake of getting through placements.

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ell
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by ell » Tue Aug 21, 2018 7:43 pm

rhapsodyinred wrote:
Tue Aug 21, 2018 3:18 pm
I'm fed up with my manager making:

b) racist comments: after a black client who is very sensitive about race after having faced discrimination at work in the past asked to join the table in the community centre that my manager was sitting at, said manager answered "no, this table's only for white people".
Not to minimise the other things you mention, but this stands out to me because it was said to a client. I would go so far as to suggest that this could be something that the manager could face disciplinary action over.

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