The Cathartic thread - rant here!

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Friendlyface
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Friendlyface » Tue Jun 07, 2016 2:21 pm

Petty I know but people spelling TeesSide wrong!

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maven
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by maven » Tue Jun 07, 2016 5:28 pm

1) Private dentists. £120 for a 40 minute chat, and nearly £3k for an implant. Ouch.

2) Regus. Rented an office that was unfinished (there was a foot wide gap alongside the door that wasn't sealed from the reception area, no textured cover for the glass to stop people seeing in, and no lock on the door). They promised the office would be finished in a few days and we'd have a rent free month to settle in. Four weeks later they still haven't started the work and they've taken the first rent payment. They say that providing a storage cupboard for us and letting us use the room in its current state and then put all our stuff back in the storage cupboard was our moving in month, and we will now pay rent whilst they do the work to complete the office. I suspect we have a bit of a battle ahead getting our money back.
Maven.

Wise men talk because they have something to say, fools because they have to say something - Plato
The fool thinks himself to be wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool - Shakespeare

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persephone56
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by persephone56 » Wed Jun 08, 2016 5:24 pm

(I currently work in Canada, so apologies if this post doesn't make sense within an NHS context!)

I work in CAMHS, with kids with significant behavioural difficulties. I didn't overly want the job, but it was a good career move. When I interviewed, I asked about kids with aggression or violence issues, and I was literally laughed at. I was assured that there's issues maybe twice a year. I'd say there hasn't been a month since I started where I haven't had an assessment with a child where I'm at risk of having to call a Code White due to potential aggression. I have been hit and kicked, and I have mastered de-escalation and redirection when I sense a child is getting agitated. But this week, out of 3 full-day assessments, all 3 kids have previous diagnoses of ODD and come with an official warning that violence and aggression is probable. I'm bloody exhausted, and it's only Wednesday morning! I'm just glad that I'm leaving here at the end of July. I admire people who can work in this environment long term, but it's not for me.

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LearnLiveDream
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by LearnLiveDream » Thu Jun 09, 2016 3:59 am

Being awake since 3am.. Long enough to get hungry and facing the dilemma of eating and becoming even more awake or spending the next who knows how long willing myself back to sleep :(

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Tue Jun 28, 2016 4:08 pm

Recently some teenage boys at my workplace noticed that my legs are unshaven. They occasionally make jeering comments about it, which I am more than able to handle when I'm left to do it without interference from colleagues, whose own attitudes are less than helpful. One boy asked the others, "Who would f*ck that?" Leaving aside the sexually inappropriate nature of the comment for a moment, I was concerned that at his age he is already seeing a woman as a 'that', but before I could react a female colleague had jumped in with, "I don't know what the fuss is about, she's wearing trousers, it's fine if you don't want to wear a dress." So we're telling them that hair on a female body is only OK if it's covered up? When a second boy asked if I'm a lesbian, another female colleague was immediately there with, "That's not nice, apologise to her, how would you like it if she said you were gay?!" As though the issue was the implication that I might not be straight, and as though 'gay' really is an insult! :evil: I didn't think a facepalm reaction would be the appropriate one in front of both colleagues and patients, but I felt like it, particularly when these women continued to air their thoughts on body hair ("What if you go out for the evening and you've got a nice sleeveless dress, ew, come on") not just in front of these boys, but in front of adolescent girls who are very self-conscious about how they look. One in particular has a lot of worries about her body. I only started shaving in the first place because a school nurse made disgusted comments about my legs in front of other pupils, and ten years after that incident I decided to stop doing something that I'd only begun because an adult who should have known better made me feel bad about myself. Now when I work with teenage girls I'm mindful of the body insecurities that can accompany adolescence and I try to promote a more positive accepting attitude. This put me in a bad position, because arguing with colleagues in front of patients is not something I want to start doing, and yet those are damaging attitudes that shouldn't pass for ordinary harmless conversation. It's left me quite upset and frustrated.
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

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sarahg
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by sarahg » Tue Jun 28, 2016 4:18 pm

I genuinely think it is awesome that you choose not to shave, especially given that you work with young people.

I have a lot of dark hair, and still have big hangs up about hair in places that is not 'socially acceptable'. This of course has stemmed from comments when I was younger, social conformity and societal expectations.

It must be so frustrating working with others who make those sort of comments, especially in front of impressionable young people.

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maven
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by maven » Tue Jun 28, 2016 8:43 pm

I accept you feel frustrated, but "I don't know what the fuss is about" and "that's not nice, apologise to her, how would you feel" are pretty good responses. Alright, they didn't express your exact perspective, but the gist was that it is your business. The comment about sexuality was a response to a comment about sexuality not equating not shaving with lesbianism, and I saw nothing judgemental about your actual sexuality or any sign that being gay was devalued in it. So unless there was more present in the actual experience, in terms of context or non-verbals, I think it was a pretty supportive set of responses to a young person questioning your non-conformist choices. Of course you can then say to both the young people and the members of staff concerned as much or as little as you want to about why you don't choose to shave your legs, and potentially open up some very helpful conversations.
Maven.

Wise men talk because they have something to say, fools because they have to say something - Plato
The fool thinks himself to be wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool - Shakespeare

lingua_franca
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by lingua_franca » Tue Jun 28, 2016 9:58 pm

"I don't know what all the fuss is about" is a very different statement from "I don't know what all the fuss is about, she's wearing trousers, it [not shaving] is fine if you don't want to wear a dress." I did speak a bit about why I never shave no matter what I'm wearing, which led to the same staff member saying in disbelief, "What if you go out for the evening in a nice sleeveless dress with your heels on, ew, come on." She was making it very clear that not shaving is only OK if you're wearing clothes that cover the hair up, and I can't read this as appropriate or supportive, especially when a noise of disgust ('ew') was used.

I also think "How would you feel in her place?" is different from "How would you feel if she called you gay?" The issue for me was not the speculation about my sexuality, but the assumption that lesbian is a pejorative term. "Are you a lesbian?" came right after "Who would f*ck that?", so I'm pretty sure it was intended as an insulting question. Asking how they'd like to be called the same does seem to suggest that it's a nasty thing to be.
"Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
"Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
- A.A. Milne.

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BlueCat
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by BlueCat » Wed Jul 06, 2016 1:54 pm

My new office buddy types REALLY REALLY LOUDLY. And types A LOT. Like they HATE the keyboard and want it to die.
There's no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong clothes. Billy Connolly.

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persephone56
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by persephone56 » Tue Jul 12, 2016 10:51 pm

BlueCat wrote:My new office buddy types REALLY REALLY LOUDLY. And types A LOT. Like they HATE the keyboard and want it to die.
My part of the building is a small square extension, with offices along all 4 walls and assessment rooms in the middle. One of the admin staff sneezes more loudly, and longer, than I have ever heard another person sneeze. It's like a scream. aaaaaAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Several times a day, every day. I've been in assessments with kids who have jumped with fright when they hear it, and it disturbs the entire building.

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Pink
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Pink » Sun Jul 17, 2016 11:46 am

Pink wrote::evil: :evil: :evil: APA style, 6th Edition. :evil: :evil: :evil:

why do they even need to control this stuff?!! Gah, I fully accept that people who do not know the difference between a colon and a semi-colon should be appropriately chastised, but inherent control-freakery of the APA speaks to something pathological lurking in their psyches. Why do we buy into this behaviour and thus legitimise it?! And why, oh why, are there SIX editions?! Don't these people ever have fun?

and yes, I recognise that this is all my fault for not learning the bl**dy manual. It just doesn't help right now.

humph.
THIS. Again. With bells on.
Kintsukuroi: 'to repair with gold'. the art of repairing pottery with gold or silver lacquer and understanding that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.

@Sushipink22

rodot
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by rodot » Mon Aug 22, 2016 2:53 pm

Came across this and it is just what I need today.....

I have been feeling hugely under stimulated today with very little to occupy myself with at work and I'm all alone in the office reading standard operating procedures as lots of people are on annual leave. Lunch is pretty exciting though :wink:

I'm also thinking about my sister who now lives in Spain and being envious of her bravery to do so.

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zoe2893
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by zoe2893 » Tue Sep 20, 2016 10:06 pm

I worked incredibly hard for my 1st class, and I have a year of volunteer experience working in a hospital. Why can't I find work?

Today I applied for, interviewed for, and got rejected from an unpaid 2 week internship (writing about psychology for a mobile app) in less than 9 hours. The other candidate had a masters. Every rejection email I've had says the other candidate had more experience. I am starting to think that I need to get a masters but I don't have the money/funding.

I either don't hear back from AP posts or they get taken down halfway through my application.

I can't afford to do any more long term volunteering.

I am really frustrated at how limited I feel.
Nothing lasts, life goes on, full of surprises! You'll be faced with problems of all shapes and sizes! You're going to have to make a few compromises for now, but only for now!

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Bela
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by Bela » Wed Sep 21, 2016 11:34 am

zoe2893 wrote:I worked incredibly hard for my 1st class, and I have a year of volunteer experience working in a hospital. Why can't I find work?

Today I applied for, interviewed for, and got rejected from an unpaid 2 week internship (writing about psychology for a mobile app) in less than 9 hours. The other candidate had a masters. Every rejection email I've had says the other candidate had more experience. I am starting to think that I need to get a masters but I don't have the money/funding.

I either don't hear back from AP posts or they get taken down halfway through my application.

I can't afford to do any more long term volunteering.

I am really frustrated at how limited I feel.
I remember this feeling!!! 2010 I was in the same boat, so many applications, so many rejections, sooo much frustration!!

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AryaStark
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Re: The Cathartic thread - rant here!

Post by AryaStark » Wed Sep 21, 2016 12:48 pm

zoe2893 wrote:I worked incredibly hard for my 1st class, and I have a year of volunteer experience working in a hospital. Why can't I find work?

Today I applied for, interviewed for, and got rejected from an unpaid 2 week internship (writing about psychology for a mobile app) in less than 9 hours. The other candidate had a masters. Every rejection email I've had says the other candidate had more experience. I am starting to think that I need to get a masters but I don't have the money/funding.

I either don't hear back from AP posts or they get taken down halfway through my application.

I can't afford to do any more long term volunteering.

I am really frustrated at how limited I feel.
I know that exact feeling and it's incredibly hard. I now have my first AP post and I'm hoping the struggle will ease off now and I can enjoy the journey. I would suggest looking out for other paid posts that aren't an AP post. An AP post isn't needed to get on to the DClin (if that's where you're headed) and there are a lot of other rewarding/enjoyable posts in mental health. Try looking for support worker roles, healthcare assistant or therapy assistant roles. This could lead towards the Dclin or an AP post later down the line. Good luck! Remember to keep going if it's something you really want. The rejection gets to us so much sometimes :(
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
-Max Ehrmann,"Desiderata"

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