5 things I'm thinking today. . .

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miriam
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by miriam » Sun Nov 24, 2019 5:15 pm

workingmama wrote:
Fri Nov 22, 2019 8:42 am
lingua_franca wrote:
Wed Oct 23, 2019 4:11 pm
1.) At the beginning of the month I spent five days as a psychiatric inpatient. I think that short week will be informing my professional life for a long time to come. It was an eye-opening experience. It also left me with a lot of hope. There was one conversation with a psychiatrist and another with a lovely kind-hearted HCA that felt life-changing, even though on the surface they were so simple. Whenever I catch myself thinking that I can't possibly make a difference to someone because I don't have enough resources/skills/time, I'll remember those two and what they managed to achieve for me in such a short space of time.
I'm so sorry to read of your illness this month. Sending hugs and every possible good wish for a continued recovery and return to wellness x,
This. And thanks for sharing. It is too easy to think of them and us when it comes to mental health, but lots of us flit between both roles (and probably end up more insightful clinicians for it) so it is good to have that conversation.
lingua_franca wrote:
Wed Oct 23, 2019 4:11 pm
2.) I've got an allotment now! I'm very excited. The idea of putting seeds in the earth and getting edibles out feels like sorcery. I know nothing about growing anything, but I love being in the outdoors, and I'm keen to learn.
If you PM me your address, I can send you loads of seeds. I got 150 packets free with some wooden trugs, and planted about 5 of them!
Miriam

See my blog at http://clinpsyeye.wordpress.com

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miriam
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by miriam » Sun Nov 24, 2019 5:40 pm

1. Feeling annoyed as an organisation agreed for me to do a big (18 month) piece of work, then strung me along with delays for 4 months before changing their plan entirely and telling me they were pulling out on Friday, whilst I had passed up other work on the basis of our verbal agreement.
2. Generally feeling a bit tired and stressed too, as I've got lots of little battles going on in my home life (mis-sold holiday, incompetent builder, faulty vehicle, a festival failing to refund after turning into an inaccessible mud-slick, and I'm still trying to reach a settlement after my RTA in 2015) and now BT openreach contractors have dug up my driveway during the rainiest weather in years, and seem surprised their trench flooded and baffled what to do about it, so they've left us with no safe access to the house all weekend.
3. On the positive side, an independent factor analysis by an academic confirmed my five factor model for BERRI, and is helping us to write a paper about it. And an AP at my company is presenting at the PQG stream of the DCP conference about our project.
4. Reading books to my children often adds extra dimensions. They enhanced my view of the Harry Potter books, but having picked Twilight as our current read we've had a whole different set of conversations about stalkers, self-esteem and putting yourself at risk, which are useful but make me horrified this book was so widely read by teens without such scaffolding.
5. Can't beat having real fires in our wood stove. Except perhaps by watching three cats lounging about enjoying sharing the warmth of a real fire.
Miriam

See my blog at http://clinpsyeye.wordpress.com

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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by luckyrabbit » Fri Nov 29, 2019 5:58 pm

1. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm cut out for Cambridge, but I think in the sea of students surrounding me, the feeling is mutual.
2. It's best not to bring up politics around my family.
3. I wish we talked about death more openly in our culture.
4. I may not have written 50k words of my novel this month...but I've written 30k more than I would have otherwise.
5. I never get sick, now I am sick, it feels weird getting sick.

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miriam
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by miriam » Mon Dec 16, 2019 12:40 pm

1. Number 1 from above are saying the project is postponed not cancelled. Guess I'll have to see which is true. But many other projects coming up, so I won't be short of things to do.
2. Number 2 is improving a bit too. Driveway is now passable, RTA claim has settled (though I haven't got any payment yet). Still got to send some stroppy letters.
3. I've got a new cooker and I've ordered a new fridge. Cooking a pizza in 20 minutes rather than over an hour, being able to bake cakes, and using more than one hob ring at a time make it feel like a little luxury. But I feel self-indulgent for not holding out until all the building work was done (even though the 6-12 month timeline we planned will have reached 4 years in March, without us even starting the work on the kitchen).
4. One of our cats has worms. They are very disgusting alien-like things. Trying to give the three cats liquid medicine reminded me of the very old meme about how to give a cat a pill (Catch cat. Put pill in its mouth. Retrieve pill from houseplant. Catch cat. Put pill in its mouth and hold mouth closed. Return from A&E with stitches. Catch cat, wrap in towel, grasp it between your legs. Put pill in cat's mouth and hold it shut, whilst riding bucking bronco, etc) vs how to give a dog a pill (wrap it in bacon). Next time I'll get the spot on treatment that does fleas and worms together.
5. Working on a grant application. It felt like we've had all the elements right this time, but then a major partner pulled out. I've only got days to fix it, and these things are so competitive that even if I can the odds will be 10:1 against us, so I need to think about contingency financing options.
Miriam

See my blog at http://clinpsyeye.wordpress.com

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reishi
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by reishi » Mon Dec 16, 2019 2:47 pm

1) Must write thesis
2) Looking forward to going to home over holidays!
3) Sick of being sick
4) Love new placement and the people there!
5) Must write thesis
"Ever since psychoanalysis was developed, almost everyone is ill one way or another"

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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by nomnom » Mon Dec 23, 2019 10:32 pm

1. I am once again surprised by how fast this year has gone and by everything that has happened in such a short time.

2. Though I know a major event this weekend could make it all worthwhile or not at all. It is an uncomfortable limbo yet again.

3. As ever, I am not coping with the cold. I just want to eat and sleep.

4. I know I will be ok whatever happens.

5. "The hardest thing you will ever go through is to love someone. Loving someone who is imperfect, makes repeated choices that hurt you and put you at a crossroads not knowing if you can continue. I have no advice for you. Just that each trial will test you to your limits, sometimes you won’t have the strength to carry on or the will to take a chance. There is no right or wrong. This is the process. Only the end justifies if the means are worth it. But the reality is, not many go through the process and very few get the worthy ending. The not knowing which one you are, is the hardest part of all. Where do you draw the line? When is it too much or enough? How to know when or if you should call it? So you must decide, if continuing to love this person is worth risking it all. Even when you’re not sure if they would do the same for you. But it is not about them. They can be good but in order for you to be great, the choice has to be yours as do the lessons. Whatever comes from these, is what you take forward and leave behind whatever/whomever no longer comes with peace."
'Forget what hurt you. But remember what it taught you'

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firegal
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by firegal » Wed Jan 15, 2020 3:12 pm

1. Professional indemnity insurance is scary!

2. It's a great feeling to realise you enjoy doing something so much that you'd happily do it for free.

3. I wouldn't do clinical work for free, but I'm loving my qualified post, and having some honorary research time on top of it is just the icing on the cake and really balances out my week.

4. I'm not entirely sure where my new softer approach to myself and personal goals has come from, but I am really appreciating it - not everything has to be done NOW, and not everything has to be done 110%, it will be done when I can do it, before it's too late, and to the best of my abilities at that moment in time. And that's fine.

5. I finally understand what people mean when people say it's a privilege to be able to work with the clients they work with, I always thought it was a bit twee and condescending if I'm honest, but most of the days I go in to work, I find myself amazed by the people I work with.

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Victoriomantic
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by Victoriomantic » Sun Jan 19, 2020 9:24 pm

firegal wrote:
Wed Jan 15, 2020 3:12 pm

4. I'm not entirely sure where my new softer approach to myself and personal goals has come from, but I am really appreciating it - not everything has to be done NOW, and not everything has to be done 110%, it will be done when I can do it, before it's too late, and to the best of my abilities at that moment in time. And that's fine.
I needed to hear something like this today, thank you firegal. I'm pleased for you to be feeling this way too, and congrats on qualified life!

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miriam
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Re: 5 things I'm thinking today. . .

Post by miriam » Wed Jan 22, 2020 3:56 am

1. I have three cats. A big black cat who is always belly up for love, a middle sized black and white cat who purrs like a tractor, and a little shy black cat with a white bib and one white toe. The big one was quite poorly with a fever earlier this week, and I was really worried about him, but thankfully he seems to have made a full recovery. It has reminded me how vulnerable they are, and in fact we all are, to factors outside of our own control and made me feel more grateful for the health we often take for granted.
2. I've submitted a grant application, so fingers crossed until we hear back in March or April.
3. I wrote another grant application, after lots of meetings with a partner organisation to agree the plan for a collaborative project, only for them to withdraw an hour before the deadline after I'd spent 18 hours working on the bid documents. That was very frustrating.
4. I loved Upright by Tim Minchin. If you haven't seen it get a week of free NowTV and binge it right away.
5. First time I've not had a looming deadline for a court report or grant application hanging over me in ages. Nice to have a breather. Might even fit in a spa day or at least a trip to the cinema with my husband to make the most of it whilst it lasts.

PS Firegal - Professional Indemnity insurance doesn't need to be scary. It is very rarely needed, but when it is needed it is immensely reassuring to have it. Phone Steve at Oxygen for a quote, as policies there tend to be cheaper with better cover than other providers. That said, I pay a fortune now to get insurance for my whole company, employees and contractors, our software and my court expert witness work.
Miriam

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